One of the keys to attaining a reasonably healthy level of self-confidence is accepting that we have natural strengths as well as flaws. This takes self-reflection.
In their book Be Your Own Best Friend, Randy Petersen and psychologist Thomas Whiteman, Ph.D. suggested a variety of feasible exercises that can be placed under the broad category “self-reflection.”
Self-reflection is merely an act of evaluating one’s self. And one usually deals not in terms of what one has materially, but specific attributes and strengths in one’s character. Along the same lines, self-reflection isn’t complete if one doesn’t deal with his weaknesses.
Self-Reflection – Physical Flaws Can Be “Unique Beauty Marks”
In the entertainment industry, it’s a well-known fact that aspiring models or celebrities are often told to have certain distinguishing features in their physical appearance surgically removed, or “corrected,” to project the illusion of looking “flawless” in photo shoots.
Among the most common “flaws” are curly, wavy, or “frizzy” hair, a gap between the front teeth, too many freckles, too-thick or too-thin lips, a mole, or a birthmark.
And yet, beauty standards keep changing over the years. A female teen model with an obvious gap between her two front teeth made it to the glossy pages of Seventeen in the late ‘90s. Girls with wavy or curly hair can have their tresses cut or styled in a certain way to reduce fullness and volume.
Freckles are now regarded as “desirable” on a model’s face, to the point that a specific type of cosmetic is now being sold so users can “dab” artificial freckles on their cheeks.
Certain shades of lipstick can be applied on too-thick lips to minimize their fullness, and a layer of lip gloss and lip pencil can make thin lips seem thicker.
Making Up for An Apparent Lack of Stature or Talent After Adequate Self-Reflection
Amateur athletes can get discouraged from pursuing a professional career in sports if they’re shorter in stature than the average basketball player, or if they don’t have as much heft or agility than the average athlete that makes it as a pro football or hockey player.
But if an aspiring athlete remains determined to make it to the pros after much self-reflection, he must accept the demands of the sport he chose. For example, while little to nothing can be done to increase one’s height, an athlete can either bulk up to improve his defensive skills, or get leaner to enable him to move quicker.
And no one can underestimate the power of putting in hours and hours of practice a day to hone one’s ability. In 2005, a young South Korean man named Shin Dong-hee debuted with his all-male group Super Junior in the KPop (Korean pop) industry. The group gained popularity not only as talented singers and dancers, but rappers, hosts, comedians, and currently, social media content creators and producers.
And yet, Shindong (his stage name) would be the first to admit that he was “tone deaf,” making it unlikely for him to succeed as a singer. It might also be possible that the considerable amount of excess weight he was carrying throughout his career have threatened his confidence as a dancer.
But what Shindong lacked in talent, he more than made up in practice and discipline. When he signed up with SM Entertainment, he received lessons to further improve his skills in singing and dancing. Shindong worked hard and was meticulous in polishing Super Junior’s dance routines. His groupmates also praised him for his wits and knack for comedy.
Short-Term and and Long-Term Planning as Results of Self-Reflection
Self-reflection is crucial in making wise career decisions. It takes plenty of time, effort, and money just to qualify for the majority of occupations, which means a lot of short-term and long-term planning must be involved.
Nowadays, going away to college or university isn’t the only option students can take after high school. Time and again, it has been proven that the skilled trades pay qualified workers competitively.
There are also fields like data entry, medical billing, legal transcription, hairstyling, and graphic design that don’t require years of education and training. Usually, gaining a certificate or diploma after a six-month or a year-long course is enough to land a job.
Telecommuting, sales, and freelancing are also good career options to take where a college degree won’t be necessary.
With numerous choices being made available, a high school graduate must be extremely honest in the process of self-reflection. He might jot down his natural inclinations or interests under “Strengths,” and a lack of aptitude in certain areas can be written down under “Weaknesses.”
Should a student wish to go to college and it was necessary to qualify for a scholarship or financial assistance, he’s usually advised to plan early – from the ninth grade onward. In general, a student would need to balance academics, extracurricular participation, and in some cases, volunteer work.
How Crucial is Self-Reflection in the Success of a Group / Team?
If one were to contribute to his team at the workplace, his church ministry or religious organization, and even the place where he volunteers, he must have done enough self-reflection to identify how he can do his part.
To illustrate, in a group of seven employees who’s in charge of coming up with a brand’s marketing strategy, one might act as the project manager delegating tasks, and another one might gather facts or data.
Still, another member can schedule and organize meetings, and one can type on a laptop while others pitch a variety of ideas.
Self-Reflection and the Birth of A Niche
As a single woman in her twenties, Faye Chelabian dabbled in several fields – marketing, illustration, graphic design, blogging, and painting – before getting married. She also made desserts that didn’t require baking and an oven and sold them to friends and family members as a side gig to whatever nine-to-five job she held.
She decided to turn freelance after years of being employed. But shortly after her wedding, Faye and her husband fell on hard times. She felt inadequate with her skills as a graphic designer, since most of the companies to which she pitched online required mastery with the latest and most sophisticated software.
She decided to capitalize on her side gig to augment her husband’s income. Faye knew she wasn’t an experienced baker, and even if she did want to bake, she and her husband didn’t have enough money to invest in a huge oven and baking equipment, having spent a considerable portion of their savings on their wedding.
But after a lot of self-reflection, Faye wasn’t about to allow the disadvantage of not being a good baker faze her. She resorted to the next best thing, considering her limitations: selling no-bake desserts.
Faye mastered the recipe of the refrigerator cake and experimented with different ingredients. Crushed graham crackers, fruit cocktail, ice cream, and cookies took the place of flour, butter, eggs, and milk. Rectangular, microwaveable plastic containers replaced cake molders.
Faye was able to come up with several variants: the ice cream cake, cookies-and-cream cake, and mango graham cake. Because of Faye’s refusal to be hindered by her limitations, Frozen Yeti was born.
Furthermore, she realized that her experience in graphic design helped her create an eye-catching logo, while she banked on her years in marketing to advertise Frozen Yeti’s no-bake desserts.
Author’s Bio
Ronali G. dela Cruz is a freelance writer and proofreader whose specialties include self-help / self-improvement. Her articles have been published in websites like SelfGrowth and EzineArticles, and she’s actively involved in online writing communities and forums.
